This leads to depression, and possibly giving up. With practice you will get better, and remember no one is perfect.
You don’t have to be perfect in order to achieve. Always be true to yourself, and be your best “you”.
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
― Howard Thurman
“The world needs who you were made to be”. Not a “fake you”, worried about being perfect or changing yourself because you are preoccupied with what others think of you. This doesn’t not matter and remember this quote:
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
― Bernard M. Baruch
Does it matter what people think? Especially if it is negative? Never alter yourself for other people. Have boundaries and live your life to the fullest and be the best “you”. Do your best and forget the rest.
A decade ago I was 27 years old. I had a 4 year old and a 2 year old. I was a living a sweet life as a stay at home Mom, and a housewife. I spent my days spending all my time with my family. I would take my babies to the zoo, children’s museum, the park, the library, you name it. I was immensely blessed to be able to do this. They had plenty opportunity to develop and learn. I read to them at night. I miss this. I would work out 5 days a week, eat healthy, and was in tip top shape. Now I do not have time for this!
Now I have a soon to be 14 year old, and an 11 year old. I am working full time, in assisted living as a caregiver. I’m almost done with debt consolidation.
I am learning how to raise a preteen and a teenager, (daughters’). They are very intelligent and strong willed. They need to have a lot of freedom and choice, and keep busy. They are just like me.
This decade, by being a working Mom, and especially as a caregiver, I have grown so much.
I have learned to be more assertive, and not let people walk all over me. My social skills have defiantly improved. I have learned a lot about life by taking care of other people when they are in their last moments of life. I have learned how to deal with grief as well.
I have learned as a working Mom, how to detach from my job, and spend time with my kids. This is not easy. I have learned how to balance married, kids, and work.
I have learned how to take care of my health. I am around sick people all the time! I learned to eat healthy, exercise, and take supplements. I’ve had pneumonia twice since I have been a caregiver. I am sure my immune system is super strong, because I am around sick people constantly. At work, and sometimes my kids bring home sickness as well.
I have learned how to better manager my asthma by exercise like jogging, hiking and swimming to keep my lungs strong, and to remember to take my inhaler before exercise.
I have grown in my marriage. I now understand my husband, who he is and why he does what he does. I can predict what he will say and do usually. We’ve been together for a long time. We know how to communicate and work our problems out.
I have grown in my walk with God. He has seen me through a lot, and has been there for me when I didn’t expect it. He has always provided for me when I didn’t expect His providence.
I have learned how to budget, and not to apply for 10 credit cards and use them all to the max limit. I learned that lesson the hard way! I learned how to frugally shop for clothes and food. I have realized I really need to save for retirement.
I have learned how to manage anxiety and depression. I learned to relax and breathe, and to tell myself that I am OK when I’m having a panic attack. I have learned to get outside in the sun and exercise, and seek social interaction with positive people when I am down, and how to utilize mental help through my health care provider.
I have learned a lot of maintaining cars. Oil changes, alignment, fluid levels, snow tires, and so on.
I am still living in the same house, which was my Grandmother’s house. I am still married to the same man, on Valentines Day, we will be together for 17 years.
I have learned a lot about people, that we all are a lot alike, and go through the same things. I am more open, and not shy, with the right people that is.
I’ve learned to recognize manipulation, and so on.
I am getting older and wiser. I have white hairs now to prove this, as I reach my 40’s. My back hurts bad sometimes as well!!!! 😀
“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.” — Harvey Fierstein
I remember a time in my life where I was going through a season of depression. A good family friend of mine told me “not to care what others think”. This was so freeing to me. What good advice my friend.
Which brings me to another quote: “The greatest prison people live in is the fear of what other people think”. David Icke.
Never be afraid of what people think and do not it let you keep you from being yourself.
Never be quiet because someone is criticizing you and bringing you down. Do not apologize for your existence.
Do not let others intimidate you. You have a right to be you.
Do not let what others think of you define you! You know yourself better than anyone else. Always be you.
There is no one like you in the whole wide world. Be true to yourself.
You choose your attitude everyday. When bad things happen you can focus on the negative, or you can decide what actions to take to solve the problem. Look on the bright side, and look for the good no matter what! You will be more productive this way.
Don’t feed into and let others negativity influence you. Remember this and you will be more productive and lead a happier life!
Peace, and love!
Some more inspiriting quotes:
“Nurture your mind with great thoughts, for you will never go any higher than you think.” Benjamin Disraeli
“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” Epictetus
I am one of those people that have to plan everything for the day. For example today I go to work, (as a caregiver) I am going to do x,y,z, and I have these people to shower.
Or today is my day off, this day is my rest day, (which rest is hard to do when you plan everything and feel unproductive when you are resting), and the next day I’ll clean the house, and this day I will spend time with the kids.
I plan everything, and I am afraid of change. I am scared to change jobs, I have been at my job for almost 7 years. Change and unpredictability gives me anxiety.
Planning is a great thing, but probably not to this extend.
This is not how life works, is it?
Change is inevitable, you cannot predict what is going to happen next all the time, can you?
I do this (planning to an extreme extent) out of anxiety. I like to be in my comfort zone, and am scared of something happening that I don’t like. I’m afraid of failure, and afraid if I try something new I won’t be able to do it, this is out of perfection. These behaviors cause anxiety, but I realize this and I can work on it now. This is O.C.D. behavior in me that needs to be rewired in my brain.
I need to let go of this illusion of control that I think I have over life.
No one can control what is going to happen and what other people do.
This world is constantly changing.
I probably do this because I live in a fasted paced city.
I need to let go, and go with the flow. And have confidence in myself.
When I was a young child, I remember not planning, we just go outside and play. Life was an adventure, and everything was new, bright, and fun. We need to remember these days and be more like the young child in us.
When I find myself complaining I rephrase things like this:
I have to go to work. Let me rephrase that. I get to go to work. I have a job to feed my family with. I am not unemployed.
I have to get up early and take my kids to school. Translation: My kids live in a country where every kid has access to education. My kids know how to read, write, do math, and science, and so on.
I’m gaining weight. Let’s turn that around. I have food to eat, and can choose to have self discipline to eat well and exercise.
I have to get up too early. Translation: I am living another day, I can make it a good one, and have a positive attitude.
I’m sick, I have cold, and flu. Change the thought process to: I am healthy I just caught a bug, it will go away.
I have a flat tire, or need my car worked on. Translation: I have a car, I have transportation. I can always fix my car.
The energy bill is too high. I have heat in my house, and warm water. I have a job to pay for this heat. My kids will never sleep in a cold house.
My body is in pain: I can still use my body, walk, run, and exercise. I can always stretch and get a massage.
I have a tooth ache: I have access to dental care.
Be constructive with your complaints, and see what you can do about it, and always look on the bright side. This is a way to rewire your brain to choose positive thoughts, and helps prevent depression!
This quote is very freeing, because I let others intimate me and I feel belittle by others sometimes. If I meditate on this quote I believe I will grow. This is something I need to remind myself, as I work on self esteem and self worth. I let others make me feel inferior. Imagine how beneficial it would be to take this quote to heart and practice it!
I seriously struggle with this. I think it is my pride, and fear of being hurt, or my loved ones being hurt.
I think this is weak of me. I think I would be better off if I would forgive. I wouldn’t be as angry, and would have less depression. Sometimes I think to myself “Some things don’t deserve forgiveness”.
However, if you look deeper, you realize that by harboring a grudge you are being brought down.
Just try to forgive but do not be hurt again, and look out for yourself and others. Don’t expect certain things out of some people, and remember that you cannot control others but you can control your own actions, thoughts and feelings.
I know that anger and grudges are bringing me down, I could do better, and not be slowed down by these things.
I would be a lot free it I let the grudges go that inhibit my peace…