Being a working Mom V.S. being a stay at home Mom.

Being a working Mom V.S. being a stay at home Mom.
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March 20th of this year, marks 7 years that I have been a working Mom. I was also fortunate enough to be a stay at home Mom for 7 years. What have I learned being from being a stay at home Mom, and a working Mom, both for 7 years?

I was very blessed to be home with my kids, to watch them grow and hit all their milestones. When I was at home with my kids, we were so close. I would read to them every night, and take them to the park. I got to play with my kids. I helped them grow and learn. I loved how close we were.

When the debt started piling up, I had to go back to work. I felt depressed not being around my kids as much, since we were so close. My kids started acting up because they were used to having Mommy at home all the time.  I have to learn the skill of managing my time. I learned to make time just for them so that they would not act up. I learned how to detach from the workplace so that I can focus something more important, my family!

I do not regret going back to work. I will have money to buy them their first car, and to greater their education after high school. I will be able to pay for the College education, and give them a better life.

This post is defiantly not to say being a stay at home Mom or working Mom is better. But to do what best works for your family.

I miss being a stay at home Mom, and not having the stress of everyday working life. It is not easy. My job is physically demanding and wears me out! I take care of  the elderly, at least 15 residents. I have to transfer them, toilet them and bathe them. It is very tiring. I have learned to take care of my health so that I do not get sick easily, since I am around sickness all the time working in healthcare. I have learned to exercise and eat right so that I have energy for my kids!

 

12 thoughts on “Being a working Mom V.S. being a stay at home Mom.

  1. I wish that raising children received the acknowledgement that it deserves. Especially when children are small, they need at least 1 parent or grandparent, not strangers taking care of them, (I consider nannies/day care to be strangers). No one will love kids as much as the actual family they belong to. I took 4 yrs off from work to be a stay at home, single mom, I negotiated child support from my child’s father, (the child support system didn’t help me). I lost my seniority at work that I’d built up for 7+ years but it was worth it to me. Now I’m working again, started part time and now I’m full time. It’s sad that stay at home moms don’t receive help, lose social security benefits because they’re unemployed and don’t receive respect either. It’s not easy raising young children, no time off really, just mini breaks. A labor of love literally❤️

  2. This is such a beautiful post, Michelle. And it reminds me so much of my mom, who was a stay at home mom until I was eight years old. She had to go back to work after my father left us for another woman. She worked so hard and made so many sacrifices, to support three kids. There were times she went without to make sure that we had what we needed and she did it for so may years without any support from my dad.

    I’m so grateful to her and I make sure she knows the depth of my appreciation and love. But I don’t think I could ever show her how much because it’s more than I could ever show.

    I will love her until my dying day!

    Thank you for this brilliant post! 🥂 Here’s to you and all the single moms for the strength you have to do.a job for both parents!

  3. It’s great if you can stay at home with the kids while they grow. It instills confidence in them when the kid can come home from school and immediately tell the parent about his or her day. Unfortunately, that isn’t always possible and the kid has to wait until the parent gets home from work. Making the kid priority becomes tougher. Do you find that you’ve had to alter how you pick your priorities/battles?

  4. Nice post it is a blessing to be a stay at home mom. I was unable to do that unfortunately. However my daughter has told me that she got her hard work effort from me. I made time for my daughter when I got home but life is even more hectic for moms. She is a VP in a very successful company in Kirkland, WA. I am so proud of her and she has traveled the world and had opportunities I will never have. I am so happy for her. I cried everyday for the longest time when I left her to go to work. Being a mom is the hardest job in the world. Thank you for your sweet article. Love 💕 Joni

  5. I was blessed to be home with the boys until they started school. I was very creative in how I earned money, though. When I finally worked outside the home, it was during the evening after my husband came home from work. Now I work in the school district. That was the best thing for us.

  6. That you were closer to your kids when you were not working has at least two reasons. One is, yes, you got more time with them. That certainly strengthens bonds.

    The other is: They were smaller. Smaller children are always closer to their parents, as they need them much more. With independence comes a slight loosening of the bonds. Not a tearing up of those bonds, just a gain of individuality. Their personalities develop further and it is natural that the family is no more the only world they know. They develop friendships, they make experiences (good and sometimes even not so good ones) away from Mom, that is natural.

    I would not blame the fact, that they develop a life of their own, solely on the fact that you are back at work.

  7. I’m a stay at home mum, I have one daughter in school and my son is home educated. Like you said, it is such a blessing being able to spend this time at home, and I do relate to your writing. I am currently starting to work part-time again. I know how you feel when you talk about working in care of the elderly, as I am a nurse. I know how hard it can be to balance work / family life and leave work at the door step. I really admire what you are doing and can tell you are a very determind mother that seeks to do what is best for her family!

  8. I stayed home for two years prior to returning to work. I struggled with the though of leaving my little guy, but just like you, I looked at it as though I would be contributing to things like sports, or a weekend family getaway that we would have rarely been able to afford when I was home. Mom guilt is real, I actually have a post about it, but we are amazing and our kiddos are our reflection of that ❤

  9. I am so impressed by you and your accomplishments! Your away from home work is also more strenuous caregiver work! As a former stay at home home and now dealing with a mother with Alzheimers in a memory care unit, I so appreciate ALL the work you do. You are right its exhausting but my wish for you is that you take time to take care/really just care about yourself. Easily written not so much done but you are everything to everyone…what good is it if you drop out of picture one day from heart, brain, blood clot issues? You need to take care of yourself first ! Thank you for your honesty! You help with your words!

  10. I was a preschool teacher for many years before becoming a stay-at-home parent to my three kiddos! I’ve lived both lives. Neither is easy. Both are rewarding. Always do what works for your family.

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