That time I found out I had an adopted cousin through 23& me. ( Adoption story that turned out fantastic)
It turned out more than fantastic.
I did a 23& me test almost two years ago. It was fun and interesting to find out where my ancestors came from. Then I looked at my DNA matches, (where you view your DNA relatives). I saw my Uncle, then I saw more people I knew. I saw a close match and didn’t think anything of it. Then my Mom called me up because I gave her my password to my 23 & me so that she could see my results. She told me one of your Uncle’s had a baby and put it in up for adoption. I was excited but I misunderstood her. I was like “a baby”? I wanted to keep the baby, I love babies, she was like no, one of your Uncle’s fathered a child that is older than you and is looking for their biological family.
So right away I logged into 23 & me, I was beyond excited, I was ecstatic, I could not wait to meet my new found cousin already. I I wrote him and told him “Hello long lost cousin, please write me with any questions you may have it’s so nice to meet you”. He also had very vague information about his adopted family that matched up. He posted on his profile that his Grandpa was a principal and yes, my Grandpa was indeed a principal. So, we just talked about everything. My late Uncle who was not his Dad also contacted him and encouraged me to reach out to him. My Uncle has since passed a few months ago in July from a sudden, unexpected heart attack at the age of 63. I got to finally meet my cousin at our Uncle’s funeral.
I would talk to my cousin at least once a week. We really clicked.
After a year of talking to him, I told him to take a ancestry.com test because his biological sister and father took one. So he did and a month later, his sister contacted him through ancestry.com. She was so happy! She said she was going to talk to her Dad, my Uncle, his Dad.
So then finally all the puzzle pieces started coming together. He talked to his Dad and he said that he could ask him anything and he will answer. He asked who his Mom was. My Uncle told him. He then found his Mom. He emailed his Mom a long letter, and she replied “whoa”, I promise I will email you in the morning, I need to process this.
To make a long story short, he got to go and meet his Mom and his brother. I didn’t get to see it but it is such a beautiful thing. His brother cried because he always wanted a brother. His Mom too cried of course. Then he got to meet his Dad and sister. Which is obviously my Uncle and cousin. I was so incredibly happy for everyone!
I remember when my Grandma had Alzheimers she told me that there’s “one that I don’t know about”, referring to babies in the family, then it clicked. I should of listened to her because Alzheimers patients don’t always lose long term memory.
I was so glad to help him find his biological family. I wonder what it is like to be adopted and not know where you come from biologically speaking. He had outstanding parents and a good upbringing. He has his master’s degree, he felt like he belonged in his adopted family but he still wanted to know where he came from for learning his identity as a person. He is from Mexico, which is cool to me because I’ve been fascinated with the Latino culture. I grew up in a Latino predominant area. I can speak Spanish with him. He is so intelligent, he speaks English better than me! It’s also fascinating because of the genetics vs environment factor and how much each factor plays into our lives.
I finally got to meet him. It was the most awesome thing in the world to learn that you have a cousin that you have never known about, until you are 35 years old. We had the best uplifting family reunion that words can’t describe. He came out for our Uncle’s funeral. My heart was just shattered. I was close to our Uncle. He died so unexpectedly of a heart attack. My cousins visiting really uplifted my spirits and brought me out of a depression. We went out to eat and to an outdoor mall, we had BBQs and visited until late hours of the night. We have a big family so it was loads of fun. I talked about what my Uncle was like, whom he’ll never get to meet.
We had the most awesome 4 day family reunion. Then he had to go home and we all miss him. We will see each other again soon.
Now totally 100% recommend getting a DNA test through 23 & me, or ancestry, or both. You may have family secrets like me. You never know. I also have third or fourth adopted cousins looking for their families so I don’t think it is rare. I know not all adoption stories turn out great, but mine with my cousin did, and I couldn’t be happier.
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